GSL – want to learn a second language? This one has the best impact!

GSL – want to learn a second language? This one has the best impact!

GSL – want to learn a second language?  This one has the best impact!

What if you could do something really amazing for your marriage?

Do you want to help your child when they struggle?

We all know that communication is key to good relationships; learning a new language is changing everything we ever knew about marriage – for the better! This same new language is making miracles possible in the lives of struggling students and young people.

This new language is grace; it is the language of love.

Grace is not our native language. If you’re a native English speaker, Spanish speaker, French speaker. . .grace will be a new language – no matter what language you’ve learned first. Good news – grace can be spoken in any language!

Grace is a simple language; there are no words to express:

  • Shame
  • Blame
  • Condemnation
  • Punishment
  • Labels, name-calling, or other invalid identities
  • Gossip
  • Judgement
  • Fear
  • And there are no words for keeping score in relationships

The language of grace never implies or encourages:

  • Manipulation
  • Compliance
  • Selfish pride
  • Narcissism

Key phrases in the language of grace include:

  • “How can I help?”
  • “You’re not alone.”
  • “I’m not going anywhere.”
  • “We’ll work on it together when you’re ready.”
  • “I love you.”
  • “Can I help you be who you really are?”
  • “I don’t believe that lie any more.”

Grace is a safe language, but it’s not a soft language.  Key phrases require me to:

  • Identify and accept responsibility
  • Acknowledge choices and real consequences
  • Own my influence and work to build trust in relationships

Some other unique qualities include:

  • Grace is expressed as much by listening as it is by speaking.
  • Grace is articulated as much by the tone of our voice, and our body language and facial expressions, as it is by the expression of our words.
  • The language of grace has words for resolve – that are distinctly different than the words we know that require performing or a similar kind of striving.
  • The language of grace cannot be used for the silent treatment.

Grace is not our first language because we are born with a sin nature – unless you’re not a descendant of Adam and Eve like I am.  Grace is our second language because, as believers, it is the language of our new nature; it is the language of Christ in us.

There’s no test for mastery in the language of grace; fluent language speakers are recognized by the way they influence others for good. – Also by the way they articulate humility and peaceful submission to appropriate authority. You’ll know imageyou’ve experienced a fluent speaker of grace when you experience peace, personal maturity, real healing of your heart, true joy, and when your own life bears good fruit – that lasts.

Grace is a language that takes time to learn; you’re not behind. Look for other blog posts about GSL, but get started learning this language today.  The YouTube video on the GOOD STUFF page of this site can be very helpful.

Comment about how not communicating shame today changes your marriage or another key relationship. I look forward to your stories.

  • Scott Morrison

    So much good stuff here. Janet, you have come a long way in your understanding of this. So cool. I particularly like, “The language of grace has words for resolve – that are distinctly different than the words we know that require performing or a similar kind of striving.” That is really good. It is a good expression of the heart behind the truth that grace is not soft on sin. And the resolve, as you well state, is not to try harder but to more deeply believe the truth, which probably requires abandoning some lies. Again, great job!

    • Janet

      Resolving to trust Him – and thankful to be in community with you and TrueFace. Such gifts of grace to Doug and I.
      I don’t know if you’ve read my post, “What do you do with an unmet need?” – your shared wisdom is featured! God is using your discernment to bring freedom to many lives, including mine! – thank you again Scott.